Listening: A Path for Understanding Another Perspective

Two seemingly unrelated things happened to me over the last few days. The first was a deep dive on a webinar and then on my podcast talking about the importance of “likelihood” and/or “connection” through building a relationship compared to just looking at someone’s wealth. The second moment, much more personal, happened during dinner with my parents.

I’ve been pretty consistent and on the record about our profession’s almost near addiction to the idea of wealth screening. It is seen as so important that it overwhelms the need to build relationships and really delve into whether an individual or couple has a likelihood or an interest as the predominant aspect of prospect management. However, at dinner this weekend at my parents, with my wife and children, I ran into a little bit of an issue regarding Christmas plans. I kind of caused a ruckus during the pre-dinner conversation with my wife, mom, and dad.  To be completely honest, I was more concerned about whether people were listening to me rather than me listening to them.

You might ask what these two issues have to do with each other. For me, they seem very much linked. It’s about listening. When we listen more often than we talk, or when we make assumptions about a situation, we see a clearer picture of the situation or scenario. We learn how people feel instead of just guessing, and we build a better relationship with those we care about or are attempting to get to know.  When we pause and listen, we actually might better understand the other person’s perspective and why it is important to them.

I don’t know about you, but I’m going to spend this week doing more listening than talking assuming.