A Memorial Day Journey - The Importance of Family
The older I get, the more I want less and less. And while I have so many options of how to spend my time, I am called “home” more constantly.
For me, family is a fundamental pillar of our lives, shaping who we are and how we navigate the world. It is found in the profound impact on our personal growth, emotional well-being, and social connections.
At the heart of any good family is the sense of belonging, safety, trust and joy. An intrinsic bond offers a reliable support system, providing comfort and stability in times of need. This sense of belonging fosters confidence and resilience, empowering individuals to face life’s adversities with strength and assurance.
Moreover, family plays a crucial role in shaping our values and beliefs. Family also serves as a foundation for personal development. The support and encouragement from family members play a pivotal role in nurturing our talents, interests, and ambitions. Furthermore, family influences our social skills and interactions. Growing up in a family teaches us the fundamentals of communication, empathy, and cooperation
Where did all of these thoughts derive from? I am now responsible for a family tradition. And it has caused me to reflect greatly.
Each year over the Memorial Day weekend, Dad made it a priority to go the Hallett family gravesites (two locations) and place flowers on the graves. His parents. His four grandparents. And his eight great-grandparents. Add to that some of other more distant relatives, it was normally a longer day. But it was important to him. Many times, I went with him. The last several years, I drove him. And in 2023, just one-month before he passed and barely being able to walk, we did it together one last time.
Now, Dad is no longer able to go….and so this mantle falls to me. Over Memorial Day, I went. While the time and actions mimicked the past, it was a new group. For the first time, I took my daughter. Through the remarkable number of (and in depth) questions from my 7-year-old, I found myself genuinely thinking about what was important to me. And while not much changed in the reflections, it was an amazing affirmation. The four people in my house, my family is who I want to be with. The people that I want to spend time with. The people who make me who I am today. The people who help me find joy each and every day.
In that same regard, there was immense and profound appreciation for the people/family we honored over the weekend. I knew my grandparents, all four, in to my 20’s and 30’s. They gave me so much love and grandparent support that I took for granted all too often. For my Dad, who shaped my life for nearly 53 years. And add to that Mom, who still influences my life today. It was these people, my family, who created the environment, provided the discipline/expectations, and loved me so very much that it still shapes me and my decisions to this day.
There is no question that my childhood and life experiences are closer to “Beaver” in the “Cleaver Family” of the 1950’s than most. Idyllic and utopian to some degree. But all of the effects of family stated in the beginning of this post I believe to be true. And, for the positive in my case. And for others who didn’t and don’t have the same grace presented upon me in my life, it creates challenges and holes that they have to deal with daily. I am not immune to God’s grace and my great fortune.
While the intent of Memorial Day is to honor those who fell, giving their life during the defense of liberty that embodies America, for me I will add to that the intended devotion and appreciation for the value of family.
